Many wrestlers have died in the last 15 years, many of them too young. Martin’s death, however, strikes me as a bit different. Not because I was a big fan of his, but because Test began wrestling in 1997, and made his WWE [then WWF] debut in 1998. The year he started wrestling, Brian Pillman died; and the year he debuted in the WWF, Louie Spicolli died. During the early years of his career, Rick Rude and “British Bulldog” Davey Boy Smith both died of heart issues.

Of course, many other wrestlers and ex-wrestlers died over those few years, but those four are wrestlers that Test — just over four years older than myself — would have grown up watching as a teenager. When guys like this started dropping dead and you’re following them into their risk-filled career, wouldn’t you take some extra time and thought to reflect on what killed those men so young, and try extra-hard not to get there?

Here’s clips from an interview with Test in 2007, where he talked about how he didn’t want to be a victim of the wrestling lifestyle … a few months after being released from the WWE after failing one of their “Wellness” tests.

The Hollywood Reporter, Esq reports it, and here’s the actual complaint.

As both a wrestling fan and a gaming fan, I’m sure this will promote a wonderful week of wrestling fans saying “OMG! A bunch of anne rice loving nerd losers!” and gamers saying “Jesus, wrestling is stupid and fake,. OK — roll those dice!”

Obligatory plug: Figure Four Weekly Online is really pant-rocking, and if millions and millions of you subscribe to it via this affiliate link I make a fraction of what Bryan will make.

Team 3D vs Lex Lovett & Buck Quartermain

Team 3D ambush them before the bell for a beatdown. Squash match.

Bubba Ray says that he’d give up all 18 title reigns he’s had before in order to hold the TNA titles once. Devon tries to say something, but his mic isn’t on and he doesn’t realize, so he yells something into the mic and then poses. Couldn’t that have been dubbed in during post production?

Winner: Team 3D via pinfall.

Backstage, Shane Douglas busts into the Jarrett camp locker room, trying to interview AMW, but Jarrett pulls him aside to rant about Sting being brought in. Jarret says that they’ll do a tribute to Sting. Then Scott D’amore arrives, with a letter from Jackie Gayda, and says that he’s read it already, so perhaps Jarrett has some explaining to do. JJ claims that women blow things out of proportion, which pisses Gail off, so JJ calls for everyone to get ready for the Sting Tribute and then leaves the locker room.

Homicide & Appolo w/ Konnan vs The Naturals

Konnan calls the “Latin American Exchange” the “new force in town.”

Match starts off with a brawl, then for no reason Konnan hops into the ring, knocks the ref out, and hits both members of The Naturals with a sock filled with quarters. The beatdown continues until Kip and BG James hit the ring, BG gets beat down until Kip clears the ring with a chair. You know, they could have had an actual match here and /then/ had a run-in, but no.

Winner: Naturals via DQ.

Throughout the show they’re airing clips of different TNA wrestlers talking about Sting and their favourite memory of him.

Backstage, Larry Z and Jackie Gayda are arguing about something with Shane Douglas watches, while Austin Aries, Roderick Strong, and Alex Shelley jump in and bitch at Larry Z that they don’t get enough attention. Jerry Lynn shows up and tells them to worry about their next match, and maybe they’ll do better if they do some winning. This was totally written for the smarks.

Ron Killings vs. Bobby Roode

Ron wins with a rollup in mere seconds. Roode demands an instant rematch, which Ron accepts. Roode gets in a few stomps, D’amore tries to throw in a hockey stick, and Ron gets a second rollup pin. D’amore calls it “the cheapest crap he’s ever seen” and calls for a third match. If this was a best of three, Truth would have already won!

So the third match starts with Truth chasing D’amore around the ring. Roode lies in wait, hits a clothesline outside the ring, and then takes him back inside. Straight to a chinlock! Truth takes control and hits a powerslam for two. D’amore once again comes in with a hockey stick, and Truth hits him and sets up for the scissors kick, but Roode hits a clotheslines and gets the three count, and that’s that. I’m not sure why Killings didn’t call for a /fourth/ match after that …

Winner: I don’t know. Two falls to Truth, one fall to Roode, Roode wins final fall.

I’m not sitting here with a stopwatch, but we’ve had three matches in the first thirty minutes, and I don’t think any of them have gone longer than three minutes.

As a side note, Ron’s on screen name appears simply as “Truth,” and that’s all that Roode called him, also.

Backstage, Shane interviews Samoa Joe, who says it doesn’t matter what he thinks about Christopher Daniels, but what Daniels thinks of Joe — the man who put him in the hospital for a month, the man who made him unable to hold his baby son. Joe says he’s bringing a new towel, a fresh canvas to the PPV, and he’ll paint it with Daniel’s blood. Shane asks Joe what he thinks about sting, and Joe simply walks off.

Alex Shelley & Austin Aries & Roderick Strong vs. A.J. Styles & Chris Sabin & Christopher Daniels

Mighty fine 6 man match that I don’t type fast enough to do PBP on. The new heel faction gets the win after Shelley pinned Sabin.

Winner: Shelley/Aries/Strong via pinfall.

Jarret Camp’s Tribute to Sting

Crowd is pissing on this from the moment it starts. Eric Young comes out dressed as early 90s Sting, all in pink, doing the traditional poses. Chris Harris comes as 1996 crow sting. For some reason he’s followed by someone dressed as a chicken, or, as Jarrett calls him, a crow. We fast forward to 2006, and Monty Brown comes out with white face paint on, a golf visor, and preppy clothes. He’s also pushing a baby stroller, featuring a baby wearing a crow mask. Monty does a few exercises before making his way into the ring. “The Stinger of 2006, that’s how we stroll.” Okay, that was a funny line, and it brings out Christian Cage. Team 3D joins him, and they all hit the ring. They clear the ring down to the chicken, and after a pause, toss it outside too.

Abyss then hits the ring and lays all three of them out, so Rhino joins the fray and hits a Gore!Gore!Gore! to close the show.

The Jury’s Verdict: The X Division match was the only match worth watching, and the final stuff was typical “Throw out everyone and have them brawl” TNA booking, although Monty Brown seemed decently funny in his role. However, a few bright spots aren’t enough to save this show. If you want to watch on Monday, tune in at half-past the hour to see the X Division match, and give up after that. TNA’s insistence on throwing out 4 matches — even if one, two, or even three of them are complete throwaways — shows that they’re not interested in re-examining their formula and trying to tweak it.

The things I enjoy about TNA still outweigh the things I don’t, but they sure as hell don’t outnumber them!

Technorati Tags: wrestling, tna, impact

Highlights of the Jarret/AMW/Kim beatdown on Team 3D from last week.

Monty Brown vs Mikey Batts and Jerelle Clark

Mikey launches himself over the top rope at Monty to start the match, and Monty catches him, rams him into the ringpost, and then spins around, nailing Jerelle with Mikey’s legs. In the ring, Monty handily disposes of one guy with the Pounce, the other with the Alpha Bomb, and pins them both in under a minute. Very effective at showing Monty’s core power moves off.

Monty Brown via double pinfall

Post match, Brown says nothing will stop him on his quest for the NWA title, and Lance Hoyt comes out to interrupt him, and cuts a promo as Brown leaves the ring, hyping their match at Bound for Glory.

Backstage, Larry Z is surrounded by security, and says the Naturals — previously unmentioned on SpikeTV TNA broadcasts! — will defend the tag titles next week against AMV.

Raven comes in, being held back by security, and says that it’s bullBLEEP! that Nash is being given Raven’s title shot. Larry throws Raven out of the building.

That was all before the first commercial break, folks. Blink and you missed it!

Nice little promo for Samoa Joe vs Jushin Liger airs as we come back from commercial.

David Young /w Simon Diamond vs Matt Bently w/ Traci

Matt wins a short mostly squash match, and Petey Williams hits the ring after the match and drops Bently with the Canadian Destroyer! He then lays a big ole kiss on Traci, and she slaps him. He then sets her up for the Destroyer — although he doesn’t normally pull his opponnent’s skirt up to reveal leather panties — and then Chris Sabin runs in to save her and attack Williams.

Matt Bently via pinfall

Next is a mock funeral for Team 3D, filmed by the Jarrett camp … and they briefly flash over the guest book, and the first name on it is “Kevin Dunn.” Hilarious!

I didn’t catch the rest of the names on the guest book, but according to a post on the PWTorch messages boards they were:

“Paul H.
Vince and Linda
Paul and Stephanie
Pat and Sylvan”

I didn’t really like this the first time I saw it, but the second time I watched it I liked it more — it managed to give a bunch of guys who didn’t get a lot of face time some chance to get across their personality. And Team Canada all had hockey sticks, which was kind of amusing.

James Mitchell was the master of ceremonies, and said that they were scheduled to bury Kevin Nash “next week.”Sabu vs Rhyno

Short spotty match. Sabu looks like hell. They blow a couple spots. They duel with chairs. Rhyno wins after Abyss runs to ringside and distracts Sabu enough for Rhyno to hit a gore. Abyss cleans up, then goes to spread the thumbtacks out, and Jeff Hardy hits the ring. Abyss is knocked into the ropes, and half-flops over them before realizing that Jeff is still six feet away from him. Jeff then hits him with a clothesline to empty the ring. Rhyno back in, hits Hardy, Sabu hits Rhyno, and everyone retreats to their corner and then collides in the center as security hits the ring and pulls them apart.

Rhino via Pinfall

The fans in the Impact Zone chanting “ohhh-ohhh Ayybsss! ohhh-ohh Ayybssss!” are the stupidest thing ever. He’s a fucking heel, for one, and for two, they just sound like idiots. The fan energy in the Impact Zone is great, but some of their chants and stuff just come across as complete lame bush league stuff.

Recap of the Nash/Jarrett/Ortiz stuff airs.

Christopher Daniels vs three wrestlers of AJ Styles choosing in a 15 minute guantlet match.

First up is Shark Boy, and he runs and dodges Daniels to waste time. After a cheap shot he hits a missile dropkick and the match is actually on. Shark Boy holds control until 90 seconds in, when Daniels hits a quick Angel’s Wings for the pin.

Sonjay Dutt is next. They trade forearms to start, and things go relatively back and forth until about the 4 minute mark, when we get a mid-match commercial break …

… back from break, we’re down to only 7.5 minutes remaining, and Sonjay has control, until Daniels catches him off the ropes and hits him with a STO. Dutt keeps things up until there are about four minutes remaining. This is NOT making Daniels look strong, but is a really nice showing from Dutt and should help build him into more of an X Division contender. Sonjay has some really sweet stuff, and he’s very fluid in the ring. Dutt hits a really nice springboard DDT, and then misses a sky twister press from the top. He lands on his feet, but Daniels throws him into the ringpost, then nails him with an enziguri and Angel’s Wings with three minutes left.

Number Three is … AJ Styles himself!

Daniels tries to beg off, hiding behind the ref, and then running to ringside. at ringside he fucking NAILS Styles with a thrown chair, and takes it to him outside the ring, whipping him into the guardrails before putting him back in the ring. Big selling by AJ, but Daniels only gets a 1 count at the 1 minute mark. Styles blocks an Angel’s Wings, and they exchange fists at 30 seconds.

What the fuck.

At about the 5 second mark, AJ hops up onto the top rope to springboard at Daniels, but he just falls off the rope, missing by at least five feet. He sells the knee right away to cover up the flub, but it was too close to the end of the match to be effectively sold, either by AJ or the announcers. Daniels leaves the ring and AJ says that he’ll enjoy beating on Daniels for 30 minutes at the PPV, and we go off the air.

AJ was wearing streeth clothes and tennis shoes for the match, and the springboard flub looked to simply be a result of his shoe slipping. Not sure why they didn’t just re-film it, since the show is taped.

I think Daniels lost that match, as he wasn’t supposed to survive for 15 minutes, but beat 3 guys in 15 minutes, but they didn’t sell that very hard at the end, and at some point during the match they made it sound like Daniels was supposed to make 3 pinfalls or survive to win.

Christopher Daniels loses the 15 minute challenge matchThe Verdict: This felt like a bit of a step down from the first two weeks, as the victory conditions of Daniels match were badly defined, and all the other matches had interference at the end or a run-in right after.

I think TNA would do well to establish some sort of interview area in the Impact Zone — maybe up on top of the entrance ramp area or something like that, above the crowd but where the crowd could still see — to add a bit more variety to the live promos.

Technorati Tags: wrestling, tna, impact

Team Canada w/Scott D’amore vs Three Live Kru
Christopher Daniels vs Austin Aries vs Matt Bentley
Abyss vs Sonny Siaki
America’s Most Wanted vs Team 3D 

A recap of Team 3D [That would be the Dudley Brothers, for those who don't recognize Bubba's gut] debuting on TNA — interspersed with footage of buildings blowing up — airs, then they cut to an interview with Team 3D, saying that they’re the biggest tag team in the history of the business, and they’re about to win the most prestigious tag team titles in the business.

The iMPACT intro airs, and Raven is shown being escorted from the building.

*** Team Canada w/Scott D’amore vs Three Live Kru

Konnan — who looks to be about the size of a house — rattles off his catch phrases and NOTHING else, and then BG James [Road Dogg] does the old “Tag Team Champions of the Woorrrrlddd!” bit. mmmm, retro.

Team Canada ambushes 3LK as the promos end, and Scott D’amore joins the team on commentary. In a nice touch, they display “Voice of Scott D’amore” banner on the screen, which seems nicely sport-ish. D’amore says that he was the person that got Raven banned from the building! The crowd is loudly chanting or singing something — America the Beautiful? — but you can’t really tell what it is. Kip James [Billy Gunn] comes out onto the entranceway and takes a seat to watch the match.

All of 3LK gets in their signature spots, including Konnan’s ridiculous shoe throwing spot — which Tenay calls his “Patented move!” The match breaks down with everyone spilling to ringside, and Ron Killings hits his scissor kick to give 3LK the win.

Three Live Kru via Pinfall

After the match, Team Canada punks out 3LK until Kip James stares down Team Canada and forces them off, and then Konnan and Kip James get face to face, while BG James tries to talk them out of fighting.

Nice touch — when Kip was running to the ring, the camera followed him closely, the cameraman running right behind him. It looked far more spontaneous that way, compared to typical wrestling camera work.

The match was a dud, but was necessary for storyline stuff, and to establish 3LK as a face team and get the former New Age Outlaws out on camera.

A pre-taped feature about the Ultimate X match airs. This is awesome. Great highlights, and a good introduction to the most amazing match TNA has introducted. They should have mentioned that there have only been 3 Ultimate X matches so far, to hype it as rare and dangerous, but that aside, this was very good.

Christopher Daniels vs Austin Aries vs Matt Bentley

Matt Bently used to be Michael Shane, for those who can’t keep track of these rapid fire names changes. Austin Aries is a former ROH champion, and Christopher Daniels is CHRISTOPHER MOTHERFUCKING DANIELS.

First pin or submission wins. Everyone trades armdrags and then Aries hits a double springboard elbow. Bently hits a cool spot where he gives Aries a neckbreaker and Daniels an ace crusher at the same time. Moments later, Daniels does much the same thing with a inverted DDT and facebuster. He tries to pin both guys at once, but fails. Daniels goes to the top and is double-slammed from the turnbuckle. Aries goes on a tear, and Tenay sells his unique approach, being a rare lefthanded wrestler. Aries throws Bently over the top rope with an inverted hurricarana, and Daniels misses a springboard dive to outside. Back in the ring, Aries and Bently collide, until Petey Williams comes down to ringside. Chris Sabin also hits ringside, and a brawl breaks out, with Bently attacking them. Aries goes to leap outside, but Daniels catches him and hits the Angels Wings for the victory.

Christopher Daniels over Austin Aries via Pinfall

A decent enough three way match, with the added storyline stuff to get the Ultimate X match over, and a nice logical finishing sequence.

 Pre-taped promo about Abyss airs. Nice stuff. TNA is proving that it can do nice focused promos.

Abyss vs Sonny Siaki

Abyss destroys Sonny in just over two minutes. Nothing match, just to help establish Abyss as a big mean guy. I think the Abyss character needs to be more sadistic … right now he just seems effective, rather than a “monster.”Abyss via Pinfall

Samoa Joe promo airs. They plug his finisher, but don’t actually say it by name, and also mention that he’s undefeated in TNA.

Tenay is in the ring with Larry Zbysko. This interview starts off badly, as Zbysko just rambles for awhile, throwing out some TNA catch phrases. He then introduces the special referee for the Jarrett/Nash match at Bound for Glory: Tito Ortiz.

Tito is shit on the mic, and it’s obvious that his interview is cut and pasted from a couple takes, or it’s just heavily edited from a longer one.

Jarrett comes out and jaw jacks for awhile. He says that if Ortiz lays a hand on him, he’ll break his neck.

And now we get Nash. Jarret attacks him on the ramp, and they fight down to the ring. Ortiz grabs Nash and locks him in a rear naked choke to no major crowd reaction, and then as Jarret takes advantage of that, Ortiz grabs him and throws him across the ring. Security hits the ring to separate them.

This was all storyline, and not executed that well. The crowd popped oddly for Ortiz when he started to choke out Nash — he should have gotten heel heat for that, but he didn’t.

Plug for the latest TNA DVDs.

Daniels cuts an angry promo at AJ Styles backstage, and says he can beat any three X Division wrestlers in less than 15 minutes next week. AJ Styles comes out and says that Daniels has a deal, and he knows exactly what three guys he’ll pick.

America’s Most Wanted vs Team 3D 

Team 3D dominates early as they cut to commercial break … returning from commercial, AMW has turned the tables. AMW hold contorl until the hot tag to Devon, and then Team 3D keeps control, hitting the Doomsday Device. Just as they’re about to hit the 3D, Gail Kim hits the ring and gives Bubba Ray a low blow. Devon grabs Kim and is about to powerbomb her, when Jarrett runs in and clocks hiim with the belt, and then Jarrett, AMW, and Kim demolish Team 3D, leaving them both bloody as the show ends.

Team 3D via Disqualification

Match was fine for what it was, but Gail Kim really was “out of nowhere” … and it was impossible to identify her until after Tenay said who it was. Bad camera work and a poor selling job by Tenay on this — it was too cut and dried. No “Who the hell is that?!” just “That’s Gail Kim!” … before she showed her face to the camera.

Then again, there aren’t that many asian chicks in wrestling, so maybe he didn’t need to see her face.

The Verdict: If you are one of those people who don’t watch wrestling because WWE sucks, watch TNA instead. It’s only an hour, it plays twice a week [Saturdays and Mondays], and it’s pretty damn fun. There are some bits where the in-match editing isn’t as seamless as it could be, but they make use of some interesting camera angles during entrances and the smallness of the soundstage makes the whole thing feel nice and tight.

Technorati Tags: wrestling, tna, impact